Texts from Tonight

With Papa Bear off visiting his family, we've been forced to take our witty repartee to texts. Some highlights:

Highlight #1:

Me: My sister says that my mom told her that you're moving in with a girl from North Carolina or North Korea, she can't remember which.
Me: It hurts to hear about it this way.
Papa Bear: I am??? And I think it's hot either way.
Me: It hurts, dude. You went to my mom before me. What else do you two talk about?
PB: Love life knitting. Everything really. She and I have become close.
PB: Ps - your mom is awesome for realz.

Highlight #2:

Me: Sometimes when leia licks my breast, she has this look on her face that says, "Stop me. I dare you."
PB: I've seen that look.

Highlight #3:

Me: Traditionally I am the good cop. You'll need to find a bad cop.
PB: No I think you should be the bad cop.
Me: Why?
PB: I think tradition isn't playing to your true talents.
Me: Why do you think I have bad cop talent?
PB: You have a simmering aggression waiting to be unleashed upon a perp.
Me: Only if the perp is walking behind me on a night I happen to be thinking of scary things.
PB: That wasn't aggression. That was terror.
Me: The rest of my aggression has only been aimed at objects, not people. If you need someone to play bad cop when you an interrogate an umbrella, I'm your girl.
PB: I think that is misplaced. You'd really shine under the hot hard lights of the interrogation chamber.
Me: It is true, I do tend to shine while under something hot and hard. It's a talent.

We have a good time here.