It's one of the most painful experiences you can imagine. One day you're walking along oblivious, you have your health, your job, your family, friends; the next day -- BAM! It happens!
Someone sends you unsolicited poetry to read.
I swear, this hit me out of the blue, I had no way of expecting it! No warning signs! No columns in Dear Abby listing the 23 Signs of a Potential Poetry-Sharer! There I was, innocently checking my email, when a short little note from a co-worker slipped into my box: "Thought I'd share some of the poems I've written over the years. Anyways, try to enjoy." NOOOOOOO!
Now later today at work I'll studiously Not Speak of It, and she'll wait for me to, and I won't, and we'll be in the middle of discussing UPS rates or something and she'll say something like, "Yeah, those rates aren't going to go into effect until February 2nd, and ohbythewayIemailedyousomeofmypoetrytoreadbutdon'treaditifyoudon'twanttoit'snotimportantIjustthoughtyoumightlikeitbutittotallysucksanywayand we'll be doing the audit then in February when the rates are in effect." And then I'll have to be all, "Oh, yeah, I saw that email but I didn't open the attachment. I'm not really into poetry." And she'll say "Oh." And I'll say "Yeah, sorry about that." And she'll say "Yeah, that's okay," but it won't be really, and she'll be wondering if I'm not really into poetry is code for I'm not really into YOUR poetry and I'll have to be careful to never, ever mention a poet in front of her for the rest of the time we know each other because then she'll call me a liar.
Yup. Awkward.
2 comments:
That's like the friends who tell me that they have poetry posted on "poetry.com" and I should go read it (very difficult to find, anyway). When I have found their poems, it is like wallowing in despair and death. Why can't anyone write happy poetry? Maybe it isn't cool to NOT want to slit your wrists and carve your unrequited love's name in your skin.
EXACTLY!
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